Giving a child time to play by herself, with no guidance, develops different abilities at different ages. This doesn’t necessarily mean the child plays unsupervised, especially when very young. But rather, free time activities aren’t clear-cut and waiting for the child to play or join. For young children, this is an opportunity to learn self-sufficiency and self-regulation: While they may prefer to be entertained, unstructured free time for children gives them a chance to work through the refusal of instant gratification, find a different activity, and learn how to handle their emotions appropriately.
Free time doesn’t necessarily mean anything goes—after all, this is in part about teaching a child to keep herself occupied. Free time activities can be planned, but the plan must come from your child. Small children may not be able, initially, to plan for themselves, so giving them options assists them, while still giving them the power to make decisions. Say, “You need to play by yourself for a little bit. Would you like to play with your cars, or with the dress-up clothes?”
As your child grows, instead of listing free time activities for kids as options, ask questions that help your child arrive at the plan himself. Questions like, “What would you like to do?” “What can you do at this location?” “Do you want to play inside or outside?” help the child to zero in on a play plan.
But remember, when children are in charge of how they play, there may be mistakes. Your daughter may only manage it for 10 minutes of the 30 you allotted for her, and you may need to engage multiple times as she learns to keep herself occupied.
If a healthily developing child isn’t enough, a few precious minutes of extra sleep, alone or adult time might convince you to curb the structured activities and value free time for kids